um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I'm at about main and main street
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Randomize
