I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
