he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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