in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize