Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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