just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
