Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
