Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize