How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize