I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
