It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Randomize
