Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
