Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize