her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
