Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Say something about gay babies.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Randomize
