Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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