4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
