there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
