I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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