Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
