I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
