Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
