Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
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