He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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