sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
