Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
