Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
