Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I'm just crazy horny about you
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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