Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
