did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
