We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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