I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Randomize
