summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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