sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize
