Your tits are I can't wait for
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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