If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
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