It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
