You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
