I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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