i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
