Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
