People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
