About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize