Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
