shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
