So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize