well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
a search helicopter?!
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
