I'll bet she douches with gravy.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
