Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
