you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
