the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
