There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
