Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Randomize
